September 16, 2009


Hello, decided to repost some of my favorite entries from my old LJ blog since nobody wants to check it out :( eh, oh well...
The jealousy of others revolving around me is so concrete that it's mighty disturbing.
So thought I'd go off in a weird tangent, with a
point of view of a dude for once :)
And uhhh, it maaaayy be based on a few of my guy friends' life stories as well. Hehe.
Not my best, but enjoy!

This brewing jealousy I have inside of me, it's discontenting.
I cannot even begin to imagine anyone else that deserves that beautiful smile of yours, your gentle caressing touch, your piercing eyes to lay on anyone else but me. Inhuman as it is, I believe that you, all of you, should belong to me.

I treasure you like nobody else can. Never would I ever want to hurt nor to harm you as my intentions for you will never expire.
Yet you can't seem to grasp that fact. The fact that I love you with all my heart, eternally. The fact that I am the only that is able to bring the happiness and thorough appreciation that you deserve.

The shine I see in your eyes when you're around him, it troubles me more than it should. I try to pretend, to smile for your sake despite my plummeting heart. Why don't I see that in you when you look at me?
I love you. Does he?

Day and night, I fret. The frustration have adhered on my skin and bones - it is now a part of me. Therefore, in the height of insanity, I'd find the only solution out I can see, to scrape and rid of all that exasperation off of my skin. As my blood flows, all the overwhelming pain I have ever experienced almost feels tangible in the air as it's running condescendingly through my bloodline.

My life without you would be a blur.

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